I used to think that I was going too far when I was complaining about things that happened to me online. Then I talked about it in a therapeutic environment, and the reality is, I’m not keeping grudges. I’m writing a diary entry. I’m talking about something that happened, and it hurt. It really hurt me.
So, after I got permabanned from Reddit for telling people that they were committing a felony (they were harassing a woman by posting revenge porn of her), I got signed up for Reddit Pro. I’m not sure how it happened. (Tonight, also, Reddit gave me the ability to sign up as a verified publisher. What the fuck. I’m still permabanned.)
Then the e-mail came.
I got invited to a Reddit conference.
A stuffed animal was promised after the conference.
So I went.
The conference ended. They sent me an e-mail to place my order for it. I placed my order for it. And I waited.
And they said, cheerfully, no.
No.
In my civilization…
… offering a stuffed animal to someone and then saying no, cheerfully, is akin to a mortal sin. It’s the sort of purposeful hurtfulness that makes you never talk to someone again.
Of course, everyone who’s ever hurt me has some sort of excuse. It’s never anyone’s fault: it’s always just an oopsie woopsie, fucky-wucky, here and there, and nobody ever takes responsibility for anything.
And I get part of that. I get that Reddit’s systems maybe don’t talk to each other. I get that, when I contact various levels of support, that maybe there’s no one person who can solve my problem. I can be understanding.
But I hate you. I really do. I hate that you gave me hope, and that you offered me something that I liked, and I went… oh, that’s nice. I’d like to get that.
And then you just… cheerfully denied it.
There’s a lot of bad shit that social media services have done to me. There’s a history of things, and I’m well-aware that, in a lot of different businesses, there might not be one person who’s fucking everything up. The system itself is woefully incompetent, and people get their feelings hurt.
But I still won’t ever forgive you. Because I’ve already gotten famous 16 or 17 times, and even if I wasn’t about to stumble blindly into it for love again, I’d end up getting famous another time, and I’d have some chucklefuck asking me for an AMA. And the answer is no.
Besides— how could I?
I’m permabanned.